The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation

Column by Bryan Rusch, posted on January 26, 2005
in

Welcome to the sideshow, citizens of the Republic! Step right up to see how Congress has made a religion through law irrespective of establishment. Marvel as the deceit is exposed in this seemingly benevolent monster created by Congress. Be astounded by the hordes of strongly deluded as they blindly follow the lulling mantra of a myopic Cyclops called 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation.' Watch as devout followers of this monster are continually trampled under its feet while attempting to remove the beam lodged in its eye.

The First Amendment: The beam in the eye of Cyclops

Let's first look at the rules, or better yet the restrictions, placed on Congress as found in the First Amendment. It may still be safe to say that we can all agree on the actual words recorded in Amendment One of the Bill of Rights, but then again, perhaps not. Just to make sure, and in case you're desperately clinging to the dizzying beam being tossed to-and-fro within the revolving eye of the Cyclops, please let go of it for a moment. Now, block your ears from the crying rhetoric of the Cyclops being spewed over the airways to confuse and entice you into participating in the freeing of the Cyclops from its throbbing ocular pain. Now focus your eyes on and say aloud the words used that torments this beast.

'Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press, or of the right of the people to peaceably assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.' - Amendment I to the Constitution of the United States of America

'Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion , . . .' Let's start and stop there with the examination of those ten simple words. First these five words, 'Congress shall make 'no law' . . . .' Sounds simple enough for Congress so far. But what do legislators do when they go to Congress? They make laws, hard for them not to. Funny thing, but did you know a fundamental part of all formally organized religions is the following of laws? It's true! Gosh, what an opportunity for legislators! Laws, religion, hey, they go hand in hand, don't they? Brilliant! But whoa big fella, no law is to be made! Did you know the First Amendment bars Congress from interfering with any citizen of this country to make up their own religion and practice it any way they wish? How so, you ask? Well, with this clause consisting of words eleven through sixteen, '. . . or prohibiting the free exercise thereof.' Those additional six words prohibit Congress from making any law prohibiting you from establishing your own religion, or following someone else's religion for that matter, more or less. The only prerequisite when practicing any religion is that it doesn't violate someone else's personal space to the inalienable rights of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. If a religion does violate this prerequisite, it will have to answer to the Creator from whom these inalienable rights derived.

Our country's founders believed and agreed that those inalienable rights came from the 'Laws of Nature' and 'of Nature's God,' or to be more direct, the 'Creator.' These inalienable rights did not come from man or governments instituted here on earth. Lawful government can only administer these inalienable rights for the benefit of all, as we shall see [ref. Declaration of Independence]. Sorry, but that is our history and thems the rules, or should I say the existential Liberty the Framers of the Constitution reserved for us. To exemplify this point, you can come up with your own religion, staying within the framers guidelines, of course. To see how successful your newly created religion is, go on out and try and make some converts. Congress has. Their religion is quite successful. They even managed to do it without violating the First Amendment. They're crafty sons-of-bitches, them lawyers. Congress' religion revolves around the service of Mammon, and you'll soon understand why we have named this blinded Cyclops of religion 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation.' The Cyclops has many followers. You may even be one, as all followers of this religion are either hanging on to the permanently lodged beam within the eye of this Cyclops, or can be found trampled underneath its feet.

Join the Body of Cyclops' believers in its struggle

Anyone, and most anything can apply for membership in the Cyclops's 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation.' Yet, Congress is smart. They didn't make a law saying participation would be mandatory or exclusionary in their religion. Anyone or any other religious organizations may apply to be part of their congregation, so they aren't even respecting the establishment of their own religion. How nice of them. Further, Congress has made no law violating this clause of the First Amendment, '. . . or prohibiting the free exercise thereof.' Other religions that wish not to be a part of 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation' just abstain from joining. No violation of the First Amendment there. Moving on.

How to join 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation'

Before one can be ordained to chase the fruit of Mammon in this church, they must become a member of Congress' religion. Congress must first recognize the applicant for membership as 'legit,' 'legitimate,' 'legal,' or 'lawful.' Remember, Congress has made NO Law respecting the establishment of religion; they have only made determinations as to what is to be 'legally recognized' within their religion, and only after a voluntary application has been made through what is known as the incorporation process.

The first step to joining 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation' is administering the rite of recognition. The first step requires drinking the sacrament known as incorporation. This sacrament is administered by priests, which are called lawyers. The lawyers then send notice of the applicant member's intentions to the father of the Mother Church. This 'father' is called the Secretary of State. The Secretary of State then breathes life into its new creation if he finds it acceptable and, voila, a new creature is immaculately conceived! The creature is now made manifest in the body of 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation,' and can do its master's bidding.

Awww', the Creature's first new steps

Being young and full of life, this new entity is ready to take its first new step and now apply for the coveted membership status in the Cyclops' religion. The new creature would like to receive the same level of worship as its master, with the praise title of: 'TAX-EXEMPT.' This title of 'tax-exempt' not only allows the creature to worship its master to the full extent, but proves to its followers that it's really serious about making it BIG.

If this new creature promises to be good by obeying all the laws that are administered in 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation,' and plays nice with other parishioners within the church, and most importantly pays tribute yearly to the elders of the Mother Church, then the elders, who are called the Tax Men, will certainly grant them their Mammon-extracting license. After all, if all new religious creatures play fair and don't make waves, then their benevolent Cyclops will allow its corporate board to share in the loot derived from their devout followers. They may even be rewarded in the future with some redistributed tax money in the form of 'faith-based initiatives'! Of course, this will all be decided by the administration that either sits at the 'right' or the 'left' of political power at that time.

For those contemplating marrying themselves to 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation,' be warned! They should know that the bibles they are required to follow are rather lengthy and often times confusing. If a dispute should arise, parishioners may have to petition a High Priest to intervene. High Priests are recognized by their black dresses sitting in elevated podiums in sanctuaries called courtrooms. These judges tend to be a bit harsh, and can hand out stiff penance for violators of the faith. High Priests interpret the law bibles for the benefit of all who exercise their faith in 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation.'

The Creature is growing and getting hungry

Personally, I don't wish to be a contributing congregation member, yet alone even visit with a body knowingly, or worse, willingly participating in 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation.' Seems like that body of believers is constantly involved in futile wrestling points in false doctrine, whining for more bread to attain favor through works, or jostling for higher position within the seats of the company, but more on this later. Further, what a heresy it is when we intertwine our faith and beliefs with theirs, and then to be pressured into feeding this growing and unruly mob, please! I enjoy my freedom to exercise my First Amendment rights fully, and profess my faith without having to join some recognized religious organization. But boy, that Cyclops sure is getting BIG. Only a matter of time before it grows so large that it can't help but step on me too since many are marrying their religions to this beast. Wonder why?

Most certainly it is because people really like money; so much so that you might even say they love it. The lure of 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation' is that it openly encourages, no, demands that members show how much they love money by reporting it to the beast yearly, and tithe a percentage of it back to the Mother Church if necessary. The yearly ritual of alms reporting to the beast by way of his or her own religious front is where a good portion of the worship time centers in 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation.' Except those who hold the title of TAX-EXEMPT get a bit of a break, because they truly love the Cyclops. However, the Cyclops conveniently fails to tell its followers that their religious sect gets to keep all of the alms received regardless of the fact that they may even be members of 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation.' Why? Again, because of these magic words from the Framers of the Constitution '. . . or prohibiting the free exercise thereof.' Maybe this is why the Cyclops wants to keep its members occupied as they fight amongst themselves over how to best free the First Amendment beam lodged within its eye? For if followers of this Cyclops ever learned that the beam they clutch was deliberately being thrown back and forth to keep them from this truth, then the monster would have no one to worship it, and trample upon. And if the Cyclops has no worshipers, then the priests shall have no clients.

Worship and trample, trample and worship, watch the Cyclops dance

Remember how I said I don't wish to be part of 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation' because of all the futile debating matches over their false doctrine, gathering of Mammon to obtain favor through works, or climbing Esau's corporate ladder. Forget that, now I wish not to be trampled to death! Time to let the sparks fly!

Join the order of priests today! Support the ACLU or the ACLJ! Sounds like a bit of an advertisement, doesn't it? Depending upon political persuasion, a person can worship on either the 'left' side or the 'right' side of the Cyclops. It really makes no difference. Worshipers on either side are just as profitable for those priests operating within 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation.'

For example, I've noticed that the American Civil Liberties Union [ACLU] likes to encourage its body of members to tattle on the other side when they violate the laws of incorporation or take off their 'free speech' muzzle that came with their pseudo tax-exemption. While the American Center for Law and Justice [ACLJ] encourages its members to pander at the feet of their masters and false prophets in Congress, better described as political whores, when the swaying beam in the Cyclops' eye causes it to stumble to the right and trample its supporters. The dance of the Cyclops is in essence a well-coordinated balancing act conducted at the hands of the priests within the ACLU and the ACLJ. Each side cites the speck of misunderstanding about the First Amendment in their brother's eye when they feel violated, then they instruct their followers to support their briefs and pleadings and grab hold of the beam to steady the Cyclops as they lobby the High Priests as to the direction in which the First Amendment beam in the Cyclops eye should swing. God forbid the Cyclops might fall over and die! Thus ending both priestly orders and their mutual interests in mammon gathering and hence, the continued worship within the body of 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation.'

The ACLU and the ACLJ lobby their High Priests in court to referee fairly on how to make the beast dance best to maintain its 'fair and balanced' composure. The pounding feet of the Cyclops always ensures some casualties and victories on both sides involved in the political tug-'o-war. In the end, their converts either rush in to pick up the casualties left on the courtroom floor, celebrate their temporal victories, or bask in their spoils of Mammon. Outsiders looking in who have no foundation in the liberty secured for them in the First Amendment are soon convinced they too must get onboard and eagerly join Congress' religion. Yes indeed, they must become converts to partake in the ceremony of decision or else suffer alone should they decide to implement the remainder of the clause granting them the right to '. . . the freedom of speech, or of the press, or of the right of the people to peaceably assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.'

As for me and my 'religion,' I guess you can say it is not of this world, and I don't plan on becoming a convert of 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation.' I'll gladly stand aside and objectively report what I see to those who wish to understand Liberty, and what my brother Paul said to do. 'Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage.'

Just a few groups that have made it BIG with the help of the big, happy family in: 'The Church of the Immaculate Incorporation':

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