Bump-Stock Bans Are Bullshit – But We're Giving Them the Finger

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Column by Alex R. Knight III.

Exclusive to STR

Following the October 1, 2017, Las Vegas shooting incident, USAG Matthew Whitaker issued a regulation outlawing, and providing for the confiscation and subsequent destruction of, all bump-stock firearm attachments across America. Many state governments followed suit – or even acted in advance of – Whitaker's edict. One of those was my previously freest-in-America-for-gun-ownership place of residence here in Vermont (along with a whole raft of other sad and pointless gun-control schemes).

Since then, predictably, gun owners have done just fine without what essentially amounted to an overpriced cheap plastic gimmick anyway – and have started just using their trigger-fingers. A whole host of videos on YouTube (although, for how much longer, given YouTube/Google's leftist cancel-culture leanings, remains to be seen) and elsewhere, demonstrate how to “bump-fire” without a bump-stock: Holding the foregrip of your semi-auto rifle, pull forward lightly while pulling back with equal force with your opposite index finger – holding everything steady as the weapon discharges. The perpetual recoil of the gun will repeatedly bump up against your finger, producing a continuous rapid-fire effect. Congratulations: You've just discovered the government-approved machinegun you never knew you owned.

Are the forces of government going to ban index fingers anytime soon? Not likely. Will they instead try banning semi-automatic firearms? Throngs of bureacrats, both elected and otherwise, foam at the mouth at such a prospect – particularly regarding those ones with a “military-style” appearance – but they are up against millions upon millions of pre-existing ones already in private hands. A more successful tactic they've employed in recent years is to ban ammunition magazines holding over 10 rounds (yes, Vermont passed one of those in 2018 too, currently under challenge in the state supreme court), but fortunately, they've a long row to hoe there too, given the uber-millions of those in circulation already as well – and most or all of them without serial numbers or other means of tracing and registration appended to them. In the case of Vermont, pre-April, 2018, magazines are grandfathered in, can be brought out of and back into Vermont by residents at will, and were purchased in enormous quantities during a six-month window after passage of such idiocy. Furthermore, it's common knowledge that scores of Vermonters simply visit their favorite mom and pop gun shops in sales-tax free neighboring New Hampshire, or further away in Maine to obtain post-ban anonymous relief. Not to mention those cousins of theirs in South Dakota who can just quietly mail, UPS, or FedEx them a few any old time.

Couple all of this with the efforts of guys like Cody Wilson and 3D printing, and it all spells veritable futility for the civilian disarmament plans of the hoplophobes and government control freaks. In other words, from my cold dead hands, you motherfuckers.

In any case, as with all gun regulation, bump-stock bans are bullshit – we still have our fingers. Even the ones we don't mind giving them.

And rest assured those ones aren't the index.

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Alex R. Knight III's picture
Columns on STR: 153

Alex R. Knight III is the author of numerous horror, science-fiction, and fantasy tales.  He has also written and published poetry, non-fiction articles, reviews, and essays for a variety of venues.  He currently lives and writes in rural southern Vermont where he holds a B.A. in Literature & Writing from Union Institute & University.  Alex's Amazon page can be found here, and his work may also be found at both Smashwords and Barnes & Noble.  His MeWe group can be found here.  Receive Alex's occasional Tweets here.