Buddy, Can You Spare a Phone Call?


In my last article, I briefly mentioned that I've been banned from calling "The Barbara Stanton Show," which is a production of Clear Channel Radio here in my home town of Victorville, in the People's Republic of California . Victorville, in case you aren't aware, is halfway between Sin City 1 (Las Vegas) and Sin City 2 (Los Angeles) in the Great Mojave Desert, and it's loaded with Republicrats. Here we have vast and open spaces. Similar in size to the space and that vast open area that lies between the ears of the host of "The Barbara Stanton Show." Gee, that's kinda cruel, you might say, but I look at this as my opportunity to take my shots at her ever since she used my full name over the airwaves and called me "a liar." Ever since, I've been shut down, unable to seek redress over the airwaves or the satisfaction of knowing what I said, or didn't say to her that could be constituted as a lie. She called me a liar on May 14th. If using my full name isn't bad enough, she made a charge against me that will be very difficult to prove and which, according to the California and united States Corporate code, is unlawful conduct for a radio station. A friend of mine and I suspect that since I questioned the host's willingness to seek the truth regarding an alleged Nazi holocaust survivor (I'm raidernationdave, by the way), who claimed things that, from a purely chronological standpoint, don't necessarily add up. Questioning things, events and people can be very uncomfortable for the mindless. It upsets the applecart of the mind. This can be distressing for folks that like to use their head for more than a hat rack. This is what I'm up against. According to the article," Stanton is able to find the merits of multifaceted issues. One moment she's agreeing enthusiastically with a caller. The next she affirms the views of another who professes a completely different position." Most people would call this being wishy-washy, and I've never known it to be a quality that one would be proud of. Nor is it a quality that too many of us have patience for. You see, some people here in the High Desert, as it's called, just don't like my opinions, which as you can imagine, differ greatly from most who live here. For example, because I've called the war in Iraq immoral and unjust, and because I believe the President of the united States, Gdub, lied with his reasons for declaring an illegal war, I've had a few callers (most specifically Dale, an ex-Navy man who still lives with his Daddy, and Mike in Barstow, who sounds as intelligent as that fat fuckin' kid you knew in 6th grade who always wiped his runny nose with his sleeve), actually accuse me of being a traitor, and my comments treasonous. I should be locked up for my opinions, they say. That's distressing in and of itself because I see no difference between the invasion of Poland and the Sudetenland by Nazi Germany and the U.S. in Iraq, none at all. Besides, I didn't personally take these actions, Gdub did. Dale by the way thinks Abu Grahib was just like Rush said, a hazing incident. Tell that to the 34 dead Iraqi prisoners. Dale was kind enough to tell us about the grab-ass hazing he was exposed to in the Navy. The spanking of other men's naked butts, and other perverted shit. As my 15 year old would say, "That's so gay!" Think for just a second what would happen to your arm if you tried to spank my naked butt. If you think that's "homophobic," that's fine, but it's my Sovereign naked butt, so keep your hands off! If your opinion is opposite of theirs, you are scum, a traitor, anti-American, hate your country, your mom, apple pie, Chevy, baseball and all that other shit. I just don't see how you bring Liberty to a country by blowing off the arms and legs of the children or killing their parents. Gee, that gives new meaning to the term "collateral damage." As it's now been proved, the Bush Administration used near exclusively the intelligence of Ahmed Chalabi, a convicted criminal, thief and obvious liar, but my actions and opinions are treasonous? Yep-per, folks here in this part of the world have no problem having their diaper changed by Uncle George. They have no problem being fucked in the ass by a man who doesn't know them, and doesn't even thank them when he's done. And guess what? He ain't done yet! But they identify with him none the less, like he's their sugar daddy, and it's their opinion that I'm a citizen of the united States so I should "get in line" too. Georgie boy would just as soon spit on their back, say he's done and move on to the next idiot to fuck over. You know, I just point things out and give my opinion. If you want to call that treason, that's fine. That I can take. But I can't take being called a liar, or other similar personal attacks on the radio, especially when I ain't. I do have the truth on my side, ya know! God disapproves of George's actions and transgressions, just as he disapproves of Saddam's, and just as he even disapproves of mine and yours. Pray for yourself and your enemy. Verbal attacks that have no basis and cannot be substantiated should be challenged and punished. You see, I too live in this community, have a business I'm struggling to start, that fortunately for my ass' sake, is growing a tad. This reference, of course, is regarding the chunks of flesh my wife has occasionally taken out of it! I have a reputation to uphold, you know, regarding by business, DCM Landscape Design and Consulting (shameless plug), and my personal life. If people in the community think I'm a liar based on the one-sided information provided by a local hick talk radio host and the giant corporate entity that supports this type of activity, then maybe we should see how far they are willing to go to substantiate the charge that I am indeed a liar. Not to lose my head over such matters, but a lot of this started for two reasons. First, I dared to state that I didn't see much difference between the Nick Berg incident and the Abu Grahib incidents. Both are wrong and morally repugnant. Do the deaths of an estimated 20 to 30 thousand equal that of one Nick Berg? Yet, there are even questions that have come up that Al-CIA-da actually whacked off Berg's noggin. How is it that 'ol (Saint?) Nick knew at least one of the 19 9/11 hijackers? Now it's also being alleged that the same digital camera that made the video of Berg's headache pain relief is also the same digital camera that filmed the abuse and murder inside Abu Grahib prison. That must be what folks 'round here call a co-winky-dink. Which is more dutiful, to follow blindly a man and his cronies who I don't know or trust, and the government they represent, or to seek the truth on my own as an individual? If I wouldn't expect my kids to blindly follow their friends and their actions, why should it be expected I do when it comes to the leadership of this nation? Should I take everything that Katie, Matt, Al and Ann tell me as the God's honest, or should I be a tad more responsible and seek these things out on my own? I mean, this is an administration that is already washing its hands, telling us that yessir, it's gonna happen sometime this summer, more terrorist attacks are on the way. Ah, but I digress. The reason I need your help is real simple, I'd like to find out why I was called a liar by Barbara Stanton. According to the California Civil Code, slander in this manner is an offense for which you can be held liable. I'd like her to substantiate these charges and bring forth the reasons why I am not allowed to rebut this charge on the air. This is where you come in. Barb's show is on from 1:00 p.m. to 4:00 p.m. Pacific Daylight Time, unless she's pre-empted by a California Angles game. She usually has a guest during the two o'clock hour. That is the part of her show, where she tries being Oprah, and where the discussion of drying paint is found to be interesting. Barb can be reached on air at (760) 241-9600. Give her a call if you are so inclined and ask her on my behalf why I have had the pleasure of being censored and left to wonder why I am not allowed to defend myself against a very baseless charge. Be prepared, and whatever you do, don't bring my name up, lest you want to be hung up on. Try something like this instead: "Hey Barb! (Be her 'best buddy' here) Hey, recently you called some guy a liar on your show, but you haven't substantiated the charge yet. Would you mind enlightening me and your audience?" I can't guarantee you won't be hung up on that one either, but at least she'll know I have my own vast audience that agrees with me, that baseless charges by hick talk radio hosts have consequences, and that I am not alone in mind, body and spirit and that there are indeed more than one anarchist in the world. So thanks in advance, and especially if it's a long distance call for ya. Buddy, can you spare a phone call?

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David C. Moorman's picture
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David C. Moorman is a struggling professional landscape designer who recently went into business for himself on account no one can stand working with the guy. To help make ends meet and to keep his old lady off his back, he is a part-time corporate liaison for a large conglomerate specializing in the logistics of specialty (Italian-American) food distribution. As previously mentioned, he is married to a Puerto Rican version of Attila the Hun, but he still feels love much the way a dog that is relentlessly kicked by his master does. The writer has two wonderful children, although their names escape him at the moment. The writer has no hobbies or anything else in life that he enjoys, sans for one thing . . . The Oakland Raiders