Hooray for the TSA!

Column by Paul Bonneau.


Exclusive to STR


It’s just funny what a complete cluster-f*ck government can make of something if you simply let them have their way. I suppose that is normal with all parasitic organisms; they could live just fine if they knew when to stop their depredations--but they never do. They literally cannot avoid the self-destructive course.
The latest TSA fiasco is just another example of that. Of *course* Michael Chertoff, former head of Homeland Stupidity, would push porno scanners, since he has a huge financial stake in them. Of *course* George Soros, another political heavy hitter, also has a big stake. Of *course* Susan Carr, a former legislative aide to the Homeland Stupidity Subcommittee chair in the House of Representatives, is a lobbyist for the company. There is a lot of political leverage behind this little company, Rapiscan. (Great name, eh?) There are piles of money to be made, and anyway it’s fun humiliating the sheep. See just how much they will put up with.
And you need to give the sheep a “choice.” This is America, after all! Just rig it so the porno-scanners look like the less degrading of the two choices. Got to keep selling those machines to the airports. Fondling kids, nuns, old ladies, etc.--that ought to do it!
It seems the ruling class has made yet another mistake. (How did these bozos end up on top, anyway?) Turns out there actually is a limit to what people will put up with; and like moths drawn to a flame, the ruling class has supplied it with a rare panache, obliging those of us who despaired of finding *anything* with which to arouse people from their stupor. It’s exactly like my favorite Mencken quote: "Here (in America) the daily panorama of human existence, of private and communal folly, the unending procession of governmental extortions and chicaneries, of commercial brigandages and throat slittings, of theological buffoneeries, of aesthetic ribaldries, of legal swindles and harlotries, of miscellaneous rogueries, villanies, imbecilities, grotesqueries, and extravagances is so inordinately gross and preposterous, so perfectly brought up to the highest conceivable amperage, so steadily enriched with an almost fabulous daring and originality, that only a person born with a petrified diaphram can fail to laugh himself to sleep every night and wake up with all the eager, unflagging expectation of a Sunday-School superintendent touring the Paris peep-shows."
It’s great to be an American, it really is. No other country can match our expertise in the absurd. I’m waiting for the mandatory body-cavity searches, next. What wonders will they spring on us? It just doesn’t get any better than this. It looks like we will have our Revolution pretty soon; or better yet, a round of secessions. The Empire is self-destructing. Who guessed it could accomplish that end so imaginatively?


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Paul Bonneau's picture
Columns on STR: 106


golefevre's picture

I tend to think the first state that secedes from this mess is going to be akin to someone yelling "FIRE!" in a crowded movie theater. I like that everyone is rightfully upset about the TSA abuse, but hope that this opens the eyes of Americans to the larger abuses enacted on them every day.

rita's picture

We're talking about people who see nothing wrong with police fondling children in the privacy of a school principle's office, or breaking into our homes to catch us sleeping in various stages of undress. Somehow I don't hold out much hope of any of them suddenly growing huevos. Prove me wrong, America. Please.