"The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary." ~ H.L. Mencken
TSA Workers Face Verbal Abuse
Submitted by Robert Kaercher on Mon, 2010-11-22 22:12
“Molester, pervert, disgusting, an embarrassment, creep." Sounds like Uncle Sam's subjects are finally starting to catch on.
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Comments
TICKET AGENT: Can I help you, sir?
FAKE ME: Yes, I'd like to get a round-trip ticket to San Diego.
TICKET AGENT: When would you like to leave and return?
FAKE ME: I would like to leave tomorrow morning and return on Sunday.
TICKET AGENT: Business class or coach?
FAKE ME: Coach, please.
TICKET AGENT: Okay... That'll be $616. How would you like to pay?
FAKE ME: VISA.
TICKET AGENT: Okay, thanks.
FAKE ME: One more thing.
TICKET AGENT: Yes?
FAKE ME: I'd like to be treated like a common criminal, to be manhandled and asked intrusive questions ad nauseam.
TICKET AGENT: Really?
FAKE ME: Yes, it helps me to feel safe. If they treat us all like dirt, I know they're doing their jobs.
TICKET AGENT: Oh, okay. Well, I'm sure we can provide that.
FAKE ME: Can they look really bored when they're groping my nuts?
TICKET AGENT: I'll ask them to throw that in for you.
FAKE ME: Thanks. I'm scared to death of terrorists. Having my nuts groped in a bored manner makes me at least FEEL safe, even though I'm probably not; even though it will probably be my fellow passengers who help me out in a pinch, like the underpants and shoe bombers.
Stewart Baker says, “Instead of making this Wednesday National Opt-Out Day in which a bunch of self-appointed guardians of liberty slow down the line for everyone by asking for pat-downs, maybe what we need is a day when everyone who goes through the line says, ‘Thanks for what you do.’” As a self-appointed guardian of liberty, Mr. Baker, and in the spirit of the season, I'd like to ask you to shove it.
I haven't flown since before 9/11, and I'm not sure I ever will again. Maybe I should become a pilot and buy my own little plane? How much for a two-seater?